Today i will begin my post by talking a little more about recent trouble related to my chronic pain issues.I had a visit at my pain clinic today and was reduced by another 225mgs a week on my pain medicine.This is A SIGNIFICANT reduction and i am displeased to say the least.The Physicians at the pain clinic are very knowlgable and i trust their judgement,but after two years at the same dose i am at a loss how a 225mg a week reduction is going to help me manage the current difficulties.These have been discussed in prior posts and include inability to sleep,no real endurance to be able to maintain a normal schedule,and a complete lack of libido.Chronic pain is a horrible curse and i cannot live any semblace of a normal life while my pain level is so high.My family suffers because i am difficult to be around and i am not very good company.It makes me very short tempered and i have no ability to be patient with the kids.As long as i continue to have such a high level of pain and it is not well managed this most likely will continue.The common belief surrounding the medicines used for chronic pain is that they are no good and cause more harm than benefit to the patient.This is not the case in my opinion,but even being closely monitored by a pain clinic the average person still is taken back learning about medicines used.Mentioning specific meds i will refrain from,but they are very strong to say the least.They do have a propensity to be abused by a certain percentage of people who are predisposed to addiction,but most folks can use them without that being an issue.I believe the problem is the blurred lines between some one who is addicted to a substance,and someone who is dependant on a substance.If it were a drug for epilepsy or maybe depression,people assume dependance.With most pain meds the assumption becomes that person is that person either is or will become addicted.This is very frustrating and can become an obstacle to a pain patient's social abilities.This is very true in my case,and not only do i avoid going places in person,i find myself avoiding phone contact as well so i don't have to answer any questions about how i am feeling and what new changes to pharmacutical regime?Its not that i question folks genuine concern,its just i don't wanna unload my burden for anyone else to have to feel concern or worry.As it is i find it very difficult discussing my issues with everyone when we are in the middle of two wars with families makin more sacrifices than i ever could imagine.The heroes over in the "big sand box"deserve our support and prayers,and their families as well.These men and women are the reason i am free to write what i want,and i admire and respect them with all i have.
I went to a great group on Monday at the social skills group my youngest attends.The parental portion had a speaker who specialised in anxiety.He described it in such simple terms i was amazed.He used a visual that is common in describing it,called the "worry hill",where you get to the top as anxiety peaks,and if you can get over the hump it's never as bad as it seemed to be.Another common description involves the "what if?"question that seems behind so many of these worries.For example"why should i get on this elevator when it could get stuck?"Well,anything "could" happen,but that is an unrealistic assumption,as are most that bring about anxiety.It can be crippling and debilitating and can take over your life if you allow it to.I am not one of those folks luckily.I have small bouts of anxiety,nothing major though.These ideas and some of his other suggestions were very helpful,and i can use them to help with the childrens anxiety as well.
News on the national front seems to be that the action in the house on the current health care reform bill will happen this Sunday.The procedural manuvers used to pass this massive new economic burden are going to be shifty at best,but for the republicans to balk at the use of these tools seems silly as they have used them to advance their agenda many times in the past.I will continue to monitor and comment on the situation as it developes.I am going to go to the park with my young son to let him swing on the swingset.The pic i posted today is me at the Casino in Atlantic City i mentioned in prior posts.Until next time,thank you for reading.
spacewalker
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